This is much over due.
Here is a list of how to appropriately behave in the gym so no one will hate you. Please read this prior to going out and buying all new "cute" gym clothes.
1. Every part of the gym is for men and women, neither sex claim an area- explore and use!
2. If you do not know how to squat, STOP squatting.
3. If you are squatting, you probably should not wear those shorts.
4. Actually, if you're questioning number 3, reread number 2 and follow it whether or not you know how to squat.
5. If someone is working out and can see themselves in the mirror...then you gracefully walk over and plant yourself in front of the mirror...if the person that was originally there can no longer see themselves in the mirror, and all you see now is your body with two extra arms and legs attached--you're an ass and move out of the way!
6. Stop wearing those clothes you thought were "cute" and focus on actually breaking a sweat.
7. If you can read a magazine on a cardio machine, go home, you are wasting you're time.
8. If you are moaning during a workout louder than you would while having sex, get yourself on match.com and leave the noise at home--the sound of an orgasm does not motivate the people around you. SHUT UP.
9. If you are going to stare at someone at the gym and get caught- Smile (It's a lot less creepy)- maybe even make conversation, it may help in the long run for number 8.
10. If you are having a conversation on your phone, talking or texting, leave the gym. You're bothering us and you're probably texting while sitting on a machine that you can't possibly be using.
11. Just because you showed up to the gym and stayed for 45 minutes, does not necessarily mean you worked out and now you CAN NOT leave and eat whatever you want.
12. If you can't lift the weight, don't...no one is impressed when your legs start doing the two step in mid air.
13. Yes, real women notice guys legs. Work them out!
14. Talk low...no one cares.
15. Drop the weights and die!
16. Strength is beautiful, functional, and your future self will thank you when you don't look like the rest of the old bags your age.
17. A woman who works out will NEVER loose her femininity.
18. Do not look at me like that because I know how to correctly do a push-up...it's awkward.
19. Yes, I am a woman. No, I am not a lesbian. Yes, clearly I workout. No, I don't care what you did today at the gym.
20. If you are overweight, STOP lifting weights! I'm pretty sure you are not training to be a sumo wrestler. Get your ass on a cardio machine and get your heart rate up! Loose before you build.
21. Selfies at the gym to show progression- GREAT. Selfies at the gym to show you walked in the door- KICK ROCKS!
22. Yes, breasts are fat. If you work out really, really hard your breasts will turn into muscle. If you are concerned about this, you will probably do not workout that hard so you have nothing to worry about. Now, learn how to do a push-up.
This list will probably continue to grow so keep looking back, it will save you in the gym and maybe people will actually appreciate you being there. If you have not memorized this list, DO NOT go to the gym, you are not welcome!
#NoBadDays
Stacy Adams
Here is a list of how to appropriately behave in the gym so no one will hate you. Please read this prior to going out and buying all new "cute" gym clothes.
1. Every part of the gym is for men and women, neither sex claim an area- explore and use!
2. If you do not know how to squat, STOP squatting.
3. If you are squatting, you probably should not wear those shorts.
4. Actually, if you're questioning number 3, reread number 2 and follow it whether or not you know how to squat.
5. If someone is working out and can see themselves in the mirror...then you gracefully walk over and plant yourself in front of the mirror...if the person that was originally there can no longer see themselves in the mirror, and all you see now is your body with two extra arms and legs attached--you're an ass and move out of the way!
6. Stop wearing those clothes you thought were "cute" and focus on actually breaking a sweat.
7. If you can read a magazine on a cardio machine, go home, you are wasting you're time.
8. If you are moaning during a workout louder than you would while having sex, get yourself on match.com and leave the noise at home--the sound of an orgasm does not motivate the people around you. SHUT UP.
9. If you are going to stare at someone at the gym and get caught- Smile (It's a lot less creepy)- maybe even make conversation, it may help in the long run for number 8.
10. If you are having a conversation on your phone, talking or texting, leave the gym. You're bothering us and you're probably texting while sitting on a machine that you can't possibly be using.
11. Just because you showed up to the gym and stayed for 45 minutes, does not necessarily mean you worked out and now you CAN NOT leave and eat whatever you want.
12. If you can't lift the weight, don't...no one is impressed when your legs start doing the two step in mid air.
13. Yes, real women notice guys legs. Work them out!
14. Talk low...no one cares.
15. Drop the weights and die!
16. Strength is beautiful, functional, and your future self will thank you when you don't look like the rest of the old bags your age.
17. A woman who works out will NEVER loose her femininity.
18. Do not look at me like that because I know how to correctly do a push-up...it's awkward.
19. Yes, I am a woman. No, I am not a lesbian. Yes, clearly I workout. No, I don't care what you did today at the gym.
20. If you are overweight, STOP lifting weights! I'm pretty sure you are not training to be a sumo wrestler. Get your ass on a cardio machine and get your heart rate up! Loose before you build.
21. Selfies at the gym to show progression- GREAT. Selfies at the gym to show you walked in the door- KICK ROCKS!
22. Yes, breasts are fat. If you work out really, really hard your breasts will turn into muscle. If you are concerned about this, you will probably do not workout that hard so you have nothing to worry about. Now, learn how to do a push-up.
This list will probably continue to grow so keep looking back, it will save you in the gym and maybe people will actually appreciate you being there. If you have not memorized this list, DO NOT go to the gym, you are not welcome!
#NoBadDays
Stacy Adams